Monday, July 24, 2006

Time Not Enough!!!

Argh...
There are so much things i wanna do...
There are so much i wanna say...
There are so much things i wanna blog...
But i just don have enough time...
ARGH.................

I wanna rest rest rest...
I wanna sleep sleep sleep...
I am so tired...
I am so strengthless...
I am so helpless...

I feel so weak...
I feel so useless...
I feel so lazy...

I donno wat i wan...
I donno wat i need...

Can someone please tell me.............

无奈非比。。。

整个周末,不知为何非常无奈无比的,做么都非常的心烦,总是想哭想撞墙的。

他总是喊累,累个不停无精无力的。是厌倦还是真的工作太累?
她却无缘无故发脾气,很任性的,时时刻刻吵吵嚷嚷。多亏他还会嘟气迁就忍让,哄着她的。她天性并非任性,只是遇上个疼惜她的他, 所以经常都要被哄得。或许是小事缺乏了哎,而大来时就依赖性强。

可是最近多了一些不可思议的事情。也不只是她胡思还是另有其因的。
到底是他令她失去了信心及安全感,让她疑惑非比。还是她对自己的没了信心?

她心情最近都反复无常。他最近都是精疲力尽的心情也不见得多么好。
可是她总算还很幸福,或该说成被表面的幸福蒙在雾里。有时事实并非那么好。这是指俩人的事实。或许俩人都会有背叛心,只是不想去揭穿对方把彼此的心割伤。

她多么希望这无奈会快点地结束。就算有么秘密也让它们一起被埋没吧!她只望目前可以安安乐乐的风平浪静,暂时都不想多想,因为她实在不懂得选择。可是她很明白这一天始终会到来!!放心,该解决的时候就面对时就要勇于面对。相信会有人支持她的!

Tuesday, July 11, 2006

是伟大的牺牲还是愚蠢的保护?

很怀疑的。。什么是牺牲?怎么样的牺牲是伟大?怎么样的牺牲是愚蠢?

父母为了孩子日做夜挨的,这是伟大吗?孩子乖巧听话孝顺,好好感激感谢,无论多么大的牺牲艰苦,都会在云霄中消失。可是,叛逆的孩子一声的我恨我讨厌,难道这一切一切的辛苦也还是伟大牺牲?

那男女感情间的牺牲呢?又要怎么解释?先别把这种牺牲看成哪一种难堪的情况!普通点来说,当个女生爱上开始变成依赖时,她要他时时刻刻都在身边陪伴自己。 即使了解这位男生要的未必是这种生活,她还是会一直缠绵着要这种生活,导致生活圈子越来越小。若两者都是斗士的大忙人,她会选择他选份较普遍的工作以获取更多的时间陪伴自己。而久为了这吃不消的生活,她宁愿自己辛苦多做来帮补这生活。这我深信就是愚蠢,十分的愚蠢。

那位公司又要怎么算?每天做OT,连加班的薪水一分都没有,可是老板却还是有不满。日日夜夜做个牛为么?公司又不是我们的,拼了老命却还是不受重用,反被呼呼喝喝的还怀疑员工吃蛇偷吃之类的又何必呢?真地想起来做人是否未免太辛苦了啊?忠忠直直的又只会被人玩笨, 转弯太多人总会累坏!

到底怎么样的牺牲才会有价值?怎么样才会受人敬仰赞赏认同?做人只好什么都别计较,那我看应该会好过很多,只是永远都会是吃亏的那个!唉。。。世上无事是十全十美的!认命了吧!人生本来就是那么不公平的啦!有人从中得益也一定有人亏败咯!可悲可悲。。。

Thursday, July 06, 2006

Busy Life...

It has been quite sometime since my last post. Exam ended, so start my busy life in my new company Sorby Marine. This company was set up quite sometime but too bad mo system was done over and account in a real mess, plus another danger is company not doin so well. Thanks to one of the director or so called the "prince" 太子 or 败家仔! Damn he spend like no body business and all personel expenses come to the company. Imagine expenses S$ 28,000++ for one credit card per month, and he owns not only one credit card.

Come to think of it, it's really unfair. We have two directors sharing evenly, and recently a Taiwanese fella joined in too, sharing off equally. I wonder why does the other director not get mad with the "prince". And i relly pity that Taiwanese fella. "Prince" uses him like an extra large waterfish. Already investing USD900,000++ into this small little company, still liquidity is low!

Though the Taiwanese fella maybe a goldmine, still a goldmine would go dry. Moreover his wife is so very petty, questioning so much. One day, they'll find out their investment is into the deep sea nowhere to be found.

Both the director did argue over this issue but it just ended in the mid air without solution. How i wish the Mr Nice director would break up with the "prince". I believe he would not let the company go bad. It's his sweat and blood here. As for the "prince", he has a home running business which he "loaned" from there to run his share here, and the fact we owed his home business the loan he actually used to invest into business. Very funny, he personally borrowed to run business ended up business owe the loan.

UNFAIR!!!

Haiz...that's the working life...challenging but yet too many brother brother business...boring! It's such a watse off time, valueless not even commision earned still we have to bear charges for all this "heng dai"!!

Not my business lah! One eye open do my stuff, go home, DONE! Audit soonto come, fortunate not me answering, some so called qualified but not even 1% professional uncle "accountant" will do so. Since he is able to give me a whole list of wrong amount saying it's all "estimated" i hope he passes the audit. If not please pray hard for me to get a job fast!

Phew! One thing good here is working hour 9am - 5pm, latest we go at 5.30pm or later willingly we stay just to clear the mess! Hmm...how responsible i am!

Going home at 5pm give me a huge advantage to cook! Yeah!! I can drink home cook soup by myself! But sometime i'm really out of idea what to cook lol!!

Class starting soon! I'll be rushing so much. I hope i won't collapse!! Tiring, very tiring!! When can this kinda life come to an end??